Like most of life, I often find myself to be a paradox. Yes, on a Meyers Briggs test I’m an extrovert, and I am energized by being with like minded people for sure. Yet, whether it comes from past lives of being in a monastery or cave, or it comes from the love of silence on an Enlightenment Intensive retreat in this lifetime, I can’t say that the sheltering during Corona Days has been terrible for me. I’ve enjoyed slowing down, going inward, getting out for walks, connecting with family and friends, taking courses online, cooking my food, doing my art, simplifying life.
There’s been a lot arising, and very fast, but there is sacred space here in which to hold it all. And I don’t know about you, but much is being revealed and I’m learning a lot - about ME. There is indeed much to reflect upon and we have the time to do what Papaji told Gangaji and all his students as he was told by Ramana Maharshi, “STOP. “
Today on my morning walk around Jupiter Harbour, out in the fresh air watching the birds, feeling the wind, noticing the brilliant blue cloudless sky, I found myself thinking like Louise Hay might ponder. Here’s the situation: we are being inundated by news full of fears of a deadly virus plague. We are forced into separation from family, friends, all humanity. We are noticing that there is no safety to be had in worldly position, possessions, purse. We now have to find peace within, as there is none to be had “out there.” Meanwhile the thoughts and fears and judgements and war within us continue to rage. This pandemic feels worse than the fall of the Towers in regards to a lost sense of safety. Nobody knows who or what to trust out there; theories abound but nobody “knows.” So just STOP…
As on an EI, we must let go of all resistance to what is, and courageously welcome everything that arises. Right now we have the opportunity to be in dyad, in relationship, with all that arises. We can stop rushing around and just surrender. We also have the time to really see how our unconscious is creating our reality, how the inner is creating the outer. Maybe we can notice that “how we are” is “how life appears”…
So is it true that we are separate from our very Self, our Soul, our Essence?
Are we separate from God?
Are we separate from others far away in other countries or within our own families?
These are the very things that tend to arise when doing inquiry, and apparently when we are in the midst of a worldwide pandemic!
Can we be with our impermanence and yet come into liberation or freedom to find our very soul, to express from our True Nature?
As the days have passed, I’ve noticed the animals coming closer, the water and skies getting cleaner and very few boats on the water. Kayaks, paddle boards and even canoes had taken the place of gas burning boats these last weeks.There was an amazing neon green lizard like creature almost a foot long which I’ve never seen here before just slowly climbing a tree as I watched! All this is contrasted by my walk along the IntraCoastal Waterway last Sunday when I was startled by a Trump boat parade, boats of all sizes almost bumper to bumper, going in both directions and completely filling the width and length of the waterway. Monday’s walk left gas and oil on my feet from the water and the “beach” cluttered with manmade debris. I felt so sad that humanity has no respect for Mother Earth.
Can we sit with every hurt, every betrayal, every disappointment? And in the letting go of them, can we eventually dropdown into the wellspring of causeless joy bubbling up in the face of a situation smelling like disinfectants, and appearing as people with face masks, and six feet of social distancing?
When Louise would look at a physical symptom she would look to the thought pattern that created it. What thought patterns might have created the idea that you are not enough and therefore separate from the Divine? What thought patterns might have us under the spell of false egoic power rather than the power of a loving presence? What thought patterns have us judge another as doing it wrong without seeing that if God is all there is, he/she/it is everywhere present?
If allergies represent my denial of my own power for example, what might the Corona Virus represent within us or suggest about us as a humanity?
What have we as self-inquirers directly experienced through Divine Grace that we now must embody? What has to shift to be in alignment with Truth here and now in daily life as we are experiencing it?
As my monitor Charlee and I sat lingering over breakfast our last November 2019 EI, I was hit hard by a feeling that it might be our last one. Energetically I was picking up so much anxiety about what was about to come and had no way to understand or process it, but I knew not to book a venue for anytime soon. No matter how much we all would love things to be back to “normal,” we may need to find our way into a new way of being in this life on this planet.
This event is undoubtedly the reason many of us incarnated during this time. We came to be awakened and demonstrate the truth of who and what we are. We are here to serve in our remembrance, to express from our authentic Divine power of love and light while in human form. It is no easy task, but when we ask for help, it is always there. Though sometimes I have to work through my beliefs and projections before I can admit it, I know (to borrow Neale Donald Walsch’s line), “I have sent you nothing but angels.” Now that power within can no longer be minimized. We can no longer be bullied by false egoic power whether coming from inside us as self judgement or from another’s shaming criticism.
We now choose to step into the power of Divine Love and Light we are, to do what we must to care for the higher frequencies and to create this world as a reflection of the Absolute. Co-creating all the beauty, peace, abundance, freedom, love, equanimity, wholeness and holiness we can imagine, radiating from and as all that is.
Call me a dreamer, but I believe. I trust what I’ve directly experienced while inquiring who and what I am. I now clearly recognize when I’m in a state of fear, powerlessness, fear, or love, truth, Grace. I intend to fully embody this knowing in the face of any and all that arises now and forever. And so it is.
Note: There are some great questions here for your self-inquiry journaling!
love and gratitude,
Durga
